Heartsick in Hanoi: Vietnam’s Missed Connections
For those unfamiliar with Missed Connections or Rush-hour Crush, The Durian brings you the very finest trashy human interest stories t...
The Durian
November 06, 2019
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Showing posts with label Lifestyle. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Lifestyle. Show all posts
Rat totally grossed out by backpackers at restaurant
Hoàn Kiếm, Hanoi – A local rat has today been mortified to see a pack of dreadlocked bro-hemians scurrying about the place at a local ...
The Durian
October 09, 2019
3
Unqualified ESL teachers complain about unqualified waiter
Tây Hồ, Hanoi – Gathered at their weekly Tuesday “brunch ‘n’ bitch” a nubile gaggle of English teachers has today turned their forked to...
The Durian
August 14, 2019
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Report: Fear of squat-drop toilet outweighs urge to shit
Trúc Bạch, Hanoi – Citing his general lack of anal aim and poor choice of beige trousers, human flashcard holder and occasional speake...
The Durian
July 24, 2019
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Vietnam to change spelling of bánh mì to báhn mì
Ba Đình, Hanoi – In an effort to further expand international tourism arrivals and lure the coveted demographics of foodie bloggers, I...
The Durian
July 10, 2019
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Local man’s phone wallpaper just local man’s face
Đống Đa, Hanoi – While interviewing local man, Mặty McMặt-Mặt about something trivial enough to be printed in Vietnam, a reporter for ...
The Durian
July 08, 2019
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MSG “fucking awesome” new study finds
Hai Bà Trưng, Hanoi – Adding Monosodium Glutamate, better known as MSG, to your meals could increase the risk of demolishing the fuck o...
The Durian
June 24, 2019
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American tourist overestimates ability to do Asian squat
Hoàn Kiếm, Hanoi – American tourist, Dirk Bellow, has today grossly overestimated his ability at participating in the coveted Asian sq...
The Durian
June 19, 2019
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Freelance satire writer disappointed to learn exposure doesn't pay rent
Tây Hồ, Hanoi – The lack of smelly news from The Durian of late has left Hanoi’s expats confused and saddened by the lack of pure unad...
The Durian
June 12, 2019
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Instagram influencer saddened that plight of ethnic minorities already photographed
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The Durian
May 14, 2019
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Man's intestinal tapeworm disappointed by man’s unadventurous diet
Hai Bà Trưng, Hanoi – Voicing concerns that his host, Terrence Mawson, was leading them both down a miserably familiar path regarding ...
The Durian
May 08, 2019
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Nation well-rested after long weekend queuing
Ba Đình, Hanoi – Following a weekend away from the usual rat-race of their everyday lives, citizens of Vietnam are reportedly feelin...
The Durian
May 01, 2019
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“Actually, it’s pronounced ‘fuh’” says smartarse destined to die alone
Tây Hồ, Hanoi – A foreigner has once again stunned Hanoi with his worldly wisdom by dropping an earth-shattering truth-bomb on the uns...
The Durian
April 01, 2019
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Cannibal guest chef, a mistake admits food festival organiser
Tây Hồ, Hanoi – Smelting Pot Tiny Food Festival; a day usually reserved for cosy, middle-class expressions of late-stage capitalism ...
The Durian
March 25, 2019
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Team behind Clean-up Challenge actually just really good at Photoshop
Đống Đa, Hanoi – Documents handed to The Durian have today uncovered the truth behind the recent Clean-up Challenge, a trend more vir...
The Durian
March 13, 2019
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Delivery range of man’s favourite restaurant confirms God is dead
Thanh Xuân, Hanoi – Throwing himself back onto his bed with an audible sigh of exasperation, 31-year-old Gareth Barnes today learned h...
The Durian
March 11, 2019
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Trump posts scathing review of Obama Bun Cha on TripAdvisor
Hoàn Kiếm, Ha Noi – Though President Donald J Trump was physically unable to fight in Vietnam some four decades ago, the POTUS has sin...
The Durian
February 26, 2019
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Kim discovers internet, becomes digital nomad
Hoàn Kiếm, Hanoi - Just days into the much vaunted “Backpacking for Peace” tour of Southeast Asia a large, pretentious and horn-rimmed ...
The Durian
February 25, 2019
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