Digital nomad actually just twat with a laptop - The Durian - Hanoi's Smelliest News

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Digital nomad actually just twat with a laptop


Tây Hồ, Hanoi – Usually found nursing a cà phê sữa đá in front of a crusty Dell, 29-year-old
Carl Watkins never misses an opportunity to describe his digital nomad lifestyle to anyone in
earshot.

“I disconnected from the grid two years ago. I was just so fed up of the 9-to-5 grind, you know?”
Kyle explained sagely.

After working for two months at a call centre in Hartlepool, Carl called it quits and packed a
rucksack with some shorts and his computer. Booking a one-way ticket to Bangkok, the intrepid
young man found his way to Hanoi, Vietnam, lured by the promise of cheaper rent.

That was two years ago, and, clearly, Carl is living the dream.

“I don’t actually have a job. But I have this laptop, and I use it. So, I think that makes me a digital
nomad.” Carl said, hitting a series of random keys while staring intently at the device.

Carl is the latest in a wave of young go-getters with no marketable experience giving it all up to
find their fortunes overseas. Hyped on caffeine but bereft of ideas, the digital generation squint
at their screens in cafés and bars across Southeast Asia.

Through a series of Instagram posts, Carl has charted his exciting journey. His most popular
post – an image of a laptop in front of a beach captioned ‘My office for the day’ – was liked
nearly two thousand times. On further inspection it appears the laptop was not switched on.

Carl admits that he visited the beach as part of a free trip offered by his hostel and was only
there for 20 minutes.

While Carl slaves away at a blank Word document, his girlfriend Moonwind is busy at home
making jewelry from paper clips and twine.

“I feel so free without a stable income or any future career prospects. I’m not tied down by those
concerns, so I can really follow my dream anywhere!” Moonwind explains.

“I pity those people who are stuck in a regular job. They don’t know what they’re missing.” The
young woman says as she scavenges for the scraps she needs to survive in a nearby bin.

“It can be hard at times, but luckily my parents send me some money every month.” Carl says,
opening a second blank Word document and refreshing his Facebook page.

Eventually, Carl is joined at the café by another digital nomad. On opening his own laptop, the
pair sit in silence, contemplating the future of work in the 21 st Century.

If you’re a digital nomad and have been affected by The Durian’s in-depth reportage on the
matter, please scream loud enough to be heard from the depths of your own arse.



The Durian is a satirical news outlet, all of our stories are completely fictional, designed only to amuse and entertain. Any resemblance to people living or dead is purely coincidental and in no way intended to hurt your feelings. Sorry for pointing out the obvious, but there’s an abundance of humourless morons out there.

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